Thursday, January 20, 2005

Not adjusting ...


  Light on the water!

     I am so not adjusting to my new schedule ... I'm still wide awake at 2:00 or 3:00 am, I miss my mornings off and I'm really lonely for my kids ... maybe my life's just not structured for a normal schedule. The photo above looks like I feel, I took it on the intercoastal in December.

      Tuesday I wrote that it seemed like I had so much more time on my hands, today is Thursday and I'm now saying that just is not true. Grrr ...

     It's way to quiet here way to early, I don't want to have dinner at 6:00 and be sleeping by 11:00, I have 119 journal alerts that I haven't read yet and I can't think of anything to write.

     I'm putting a copy of a guarenteed to quiet your thoughts late at night cd in the mail tomorrow for a J-Land friend that's been having trouble sleeping ... I may have to listen to it myself tonight, haven't needed it in quite some time. 

     I'm trying to set up my new DSL Modem and it's just not working and I can't get a live person on the phone. The three simple steps they speak of are not that simple ... at least not for me ... at least not tonight.

     My friend Dan from work built my computer and usually helps me with any technical issues ... he's usually a phone call away but ... right now he's on his way to Seattle and not answering his phone ... I hate when that happens.

     The easy instructions say to install filters, plug in the power, the phone line and the earthnet cable and then turn on the power button and both lights will come on ... power and DSL. Well ... my modem has no power button and it has 4 lights instead of 2 lights. I do have 2 lights on but the DSL light is not one of them:-(

     I plugged my dial up back in, I'll try again tomorrow. Oh yeah, I'm listening to frou frou at the moment and guess what? frou frou is not making me happy ... maybe because I bought the details album today, it was the only one on the shelf ... maybe because I'm already not feeling so happy who knows.

     Right now I'm just hearing something like "Let go, let go, jump in, it's all right ... there's beauty in the breakdown." I'm sure that I'll be feeling better by tomorrow and I'll listen again after all frou frou comes highly recommended here in J-Land.

             SloMo <--     Baby Shark <--     

Check out the awesome website ...    frou frou <--                

                         *** Coy ***



lifewrites said...

Dear Coy,
   I just started reading your journal recently when yours was featured as a tip-top journal. I hadn't read any journals before that and so I feel really priviliged to be able to start journal reading by reading one that is so very good.  This is the first entry that I have read where you seem a bit out of sorts.  While I am sure that you know exactly what to do, I just want to remind you that you are going through a big adjustment period with your schedule changing so drastically.  May I suggest that you take really good care of yourself by eating well, sleeping well, taking time to do the things you love and keeping your schedule fairly open for now so that you will have time to take care of your extra needs while you are adjusting?  I know what it feels like to feel like this picture you posted.  I am just coming out of a deep depression that lasted for three years and while you probably are not suffering from depression, changing sleep patterns and the daily schedule can throw you for a loop and make you feel dark and fragmented.  But know that you will adjust and be on your way.  Part of what has helped me to find joy in life again has been reading about your attention to the simple pleasures in life and taking in your excellent photos.  I especially liked the carousel horse. You have helped me so much in my recovery just in the last few weeks. I felt I really owe you a bit of a cheerleading session after all you have done for me.
   Remember how you felt at first, like you had more time and such?  That is the truth.  It's just that your daily patterns have been sufficiently thrown off now and the effects have caught up with you. Of course you  are feeling funky.  When that wears off, you will feel just like you did at first before the fatigue came on.  It will not last.  I repeat: It will not last!
   From the other side of the continent (C

sasonalmah said...

I hope you start adjusting soon! I have been adjusting to a new schedule, too, but not as drastic as yours!


shewolfdancing said...

Hey Coy!   Thank you for all the lovely comments you have left in my journal over the last few weeks.  Being at home I was busy and didn't have too much time to go journal hopping... and so now I am playing catchup.  Sorry your modem isnt working right.  My dad is a guru.. he actualy does this sort of thing now for his retirement "fun time"... he builds computers and messes with all the set up stuff... he loves a challange.  Me, on the other hand, I have no idea about any of that stuff... wish I could help you thought.  Sounds like your just going to have to hang on till your friend is able to help out.  I know how frustrating that can be!  

I am mildely distracted right now by the really stupid spider movie on Sci Fi... as much as it is rediculus, I love goofie movies like this one... hehehe... (Todd is cringing)...

I can totaly understand your change of sleeping habits driving you nuts... I too have felt the strange pull of awakeness at 2am... but that could be due to too much tea as well.

Well enough yacking here... I will be back again for more!  As always...  :)
Keep smileing, and try to have a good night.  I find a little wine always helps :) ::grin:::     ~K

suzypwr said...

In the long run, your body might be happier with a more consistent schedule. The change over sucks, though, doesn't it? I hope you learn to enjoy it better, since this is your schedule now, right? Maybe you need more chocolate.

jibaro6543 said...

I do hope that the new schedule and the changes even out for you soon. I have a CD of waves...just waves...and that relaxes me incredibly...Take Care

boiseladie said...

Oh, I hope you get your DSL hooked up soon, you're gonna love it!

mykesmom75 said...

Sorry your having such a bad time......It'll work out....relax and try again another day....God Bless You

jeanno43 said...

Sorry things are not going well for you.  It is early days, give it time, you will settle into the new schedule. Have a great weekend xxxxxx

sylviam4000 said...

I tried with every frustration you can think of to get Broadband a few months ago. Last night I agreed with aol to try again. Will take about 2 weeks to get sorted and then, just maybe, a miracle will happen this time. I will be on Broadband. No more folks moaning because the phone line is blocked and not having time for a nap between loading pages. I live in dreams.
Love Sylvia

dcmeyer420 said...

Adjusting to a different schedule can be a pain. I used to work the night shift and when I was finally given the coveted morning shift, it took me a while to get used to it! Have a great weekend!

geminiwilder said...

i hope your days get straightend out again soon.  i hate feeling "off-kilter" too.   frou frou?  going to have to check that out.  :)  i love the water photo, gosh, it must have been the dark of night when you took that!      

    happy Friday!  and have a good weekend, coy!    

bookncoffee said...

Coy, that is a neat photo.  I didn't know what it was!  

I sure hope you get used to your new schedule.  I think something like that takes a few weeks.  You may be sleepy and irratable for a while - is what I hear.  Also, schedule changes can make you gain or lose weight b/c your eating patterns change.

Take care of yourself!  

sanforized6 said...

Sorry to hear you so bummed out, BUT, all things work out. Trust me, I used to sell cars lol. rich

slowmotionlife said...

Oh, poor thing.  Insomnia stinks!!  I went three years with SEVERE insomnia - not fun.  These days, I usually can sleep pretty easily.  But occasionally, I still have nights when I can't sleep.  Have you tried taking a little something?  Like a Tylenol PM or something like that - just until you get back on a proper schedule?  It might help.  

As for Frou Frou.. lurve them!  But I don't know that they're for everyone.  Hopefully you'll enjoy them more when you're in higher spirits.  :(

nellemclaughlin said...

You did install the DSL CD right? My mother-in-law didn't know to do that and hers didn't work. When I told her she needed to do that she said a computer tech told her it wasn't necessary! Hmm yes it is! Just a thought. Ours was easy to do. The computer phone line cannot be hooked into the filter either. If you want a phone and the DSL line together you will need a split phone jack with the phone through the filter and the computer line not. Just a few hints, hope it helps. Nelle

ann7inflorida said...

Aww, Coy, I hope that things get easier and you find yourself adjusting to the new schedule. If anyone can snap out of a funk, it's you! You always have such a positive attitude. Muchos hugs to you! ~Ann : )

PS- Frou Frou is GREAT! : D

sonensmilinmon said...

I never heard of Frou frou before, but, I liked what I heard. :-) I'll have to check them out some more.  As for the schedule and the funk, I've been thinking about that myself.  Knowing I'm going to have to deal with all that when I return to work.  I want to get back to a scheduled routine yet, I really LOVE my freedom.  I hope you get yourself together soon, and are able to get some rest.


babyshark28 said...

awww, you were feeling down in this entry. I am hoping (by reading your entry above) that you are indeed feeling better.  I know I have had days like this...for quite a few days.  just not feeling adjusted, not melding with my life....and not liking it!   I am not the best at giving advice for this, because I don't really don't do much to get out of it....I write a lot of poetry, that helps me a great deal. I listen to frou frou, her words help to understand myself or they just help ride out the intense feelings I have, it's like she says it's ok to have a break down,you know?  I need to hear that.   I find that I make myself happy, even when I am not...I don't sit back and explore if I am really upset or sad or why I am.   So, that is why I say "Frou Frou makes me happy". It's not bubbly happy music that's for sure, but it comforts me.
maybe I should have made that more clear.....
but, I did laugh to myself when you said:
"I'm listening to frou frou at the moment and guess what?  frou frou is not making me happy."   sorry, had to chuckle.  because I knew what you were talking about.
but, she is good, in a soft..slow..easy kind of way.   she makes it rain, so we can began looking for rainbows.  ooooh deeeep. :p
ok, writing a book here!!
good luck with computer, DSL is cool, so I hope that get's worked out soon. :)

alphawoman1 said...

I  hooked up my dsl the other day and it did not work....I was on the phone an eternity waiting for the tech staff to pick up!  All that while I back tracked and reconnected everything...watched the disc (I missed the part of 'watch disc first' before I attached everything.  OMG!!! I had the phone jack and dsl jack reversed! They look just alike.  Guess what! DSL, baby!  I love it!  I can cruise journals at break neck speed.  

mommysquiettime said...

My husband LOVES that frou frou song!  We first heard while we were watching the movie "Garden State".  He bought it and has been listening to it a lot!  :-)  It is very relaxing.
I hope that you adjust to your schedule.  I'm a night person, myself, and I'm trying SO hard to change that.  I want to be a person who feels the best during the day!  
That picture of the water is gorgeous!  I'm so impressed with your photos!

deabvt said...

Hang in there, coy.